Teen Girls Define “A Real Man”

Lori Hainline & Rebecca Chandler co-authored this list at the respective ages of 19 and 17. Their closing comment: This list is not exhaustive and men like this do exist!

A real man . . .


…understands and lives according to the basic purposes for which he was created: to worship, honor, and serve God. (Romans 12:1-2)

…values and carefully handles the scriptures. (2 Timothy 2:15)

…doesn’t pride himself on being knowledgeable in the sinful ways of the world. (1 John 2:15-16, James 4:4, Philippians 4:8)

…isn’t embarrassed to worship God and pray in a group setting. (Mark 8:38)

…is wise, yet humble. (Proverbs 2:1-10, 1 Peter 5:5, Romans 12:16)

…takes leadership in a self-sacrificing way. (Ephesians 5:25-28)


…is kind because, “What is desirable in man is his kindness” (Proverbs 19:22)

…doesn’t try to prove himself but is simply confident as he walks in the fear of the Lord. (Proverbs 14:26-27)

…doesn’t put others down with his actions, attitude, words, or his strength. But on the contrary, he affirms and builds others up (Proverbs 15:4, Ephesians 4:29)

…treats his sisters and mother with as much respect as he would treat a prospective wife. (Matthew 25:21)


…not only respects but appreciates a young lady’s purity and innocence. In our culture innocence isn’t retained by accident. (2 Corinthians 11:2-3)

…values his purity as much as he values a young lady’s purity. He is not ashamed to live and act differently from the world in order to guard himself. (1 Thessalonians 4:1-8, Ecclesiastes 7:26)

…can look a girl straight in the eye without communicating any impurity. (Proverbs 20:11)

…isn’t ashamed to identify himself with his family (Ephesians 6:2-3)


…is a gentleman. He is polite and shows women honor in everyday things such as opening doors, etc. (1 Peter 3:7)

…has no desire to be gross in order to impress other men. He doesn’t burp, swear, or tell disgusting stories. (Proverbs 13:5, Ephesians 5:4)

…shows by his actions that he loves children. (Matthew 19:13-14)


…is pleasant and expresses joy rather than feeling that it’s masculine to be sullen. (Proverbs 21:29, 1 Thessalonians 5:16)

…doesn’t blame others for his own problems but embraces responsibility. (Proverbs 12:27)

…can accept correction (Proverbs 12:1, Proverbs 29:1)

…is mature in his emotions and his expressions of them. He can deal with the trials of life logically, with wisdom, not on a basis of emotional instability. (Proverbs 14:29, Proverbs 17:27, Proverbs 12:18)


…understands the value of work and is financially responsible. (Colossians 3:23-24, 2 Thessalonians 3:10-12, Luke 16:10-11)

…expresses himself with intelligent words rather than using “street talk”. (Proverbs 17:20, Titus 2:6-8, 1 Peter 4:11, Ephesians 4:29